Today, I’m at the halfway mark and I am reflecting on my experience by writing a letter to “Day 1 Amber” from Day 50. Also, Week Eight’s theme is about recovering a sense of strength, and I feel strength returning to me in the form of a creative firestorm and a desire to share more of my art.

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100 Liminal Days is an experimental project of embracing my current transitional season after exiting my business. I’m sharing an honest, real-time account of my self-initiation experience in daily posts. I’m using The Artist’s Way as a guiding tool, and sending shorter weekly recaps only via my newsletter. Visit Day 1/100 to learn more and sign up to get the weekly recaps delivered to your inbox.

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Dear Day 1 Amber,

It’s Day 50 and I am thinking about you – the version of me that was curious enough to set out on this 100 day journey. So much has changed, and clarity comes a little more as I keep going, but I have to start with saying thank you for your courage to take the first step.

When you kicked this off, you did it with a hefty dose of trust in yourself and God, but you carried with you a sense of urgency as you searched for the the thing that you could name as your dharma. I admire and appreciate that you had such a drive to discover how big you could make this one precious life.

However, I’m here on Day 50 to tell you that strength didn’t come from finding the answer to that question, neither did it come from digging deeper every single day, and doing more. It actually came from tuning into who you are at your core – feeling into your body, listening to your dreams, and doing parts work along the way.

Strength came through clearing out the old, stagnant beliefs that were holding you in this liminal space. Like stuck Qi in your body, your belief system hadn’t seen enough movement in quite some time.

But we shook things up with this project, didn’t we?

And shaking is a great way to clear out stagnant Qi. It must also be good for clearing out old beliefs about ourselves. As I cleared space within me, I released a need to perform for others. I released the belief that there must be just one big thing I am to do with my life now that I’m not a CEO. And I allowed my creativity to be what it wants to be. I cultivated something new – fresh, flowing creative energy.

The truth is, something has shifted in me even over the last week. It feels like a simplification of my goals has settled my spirit. I see how consistent commitment to body attunement, creating every day, and being vulnerable with others paved the way to the clarity you were seeking all along.

And the results? Lingering in this liminal space didn’t make me feel more lost. Strength isn’t about enduring a grinding and grueling process of seeking until we find the answer. What we’ve learned over the first half of this project is that the answer lies in the smallest of steps. It’s about showing up daily, not discovering what you thought would be the answer. Simplification has created the space for consistency and consistency creates the momentum we really needed.

You’ll be glad to know that I’ve reached a stage where I can see my self creating a financially abundant life through qigong, writing, and painting, instead of choosing one big “business-y” thing. And one thing you were so right about – the liminal space isn’t a problem to solve. It’s a studio to create in.

Last weekend when I was in breathwork and released the need to perform in my creative expression, I called in more creativity to fill the space. And creativity came in like a firestorm. I’ve been painting several times over the last few weeks – the skulls and more birthday cards.

It’s funny because I assumed the halfway point would look like the place where things started ramping up. But it turns out, Day 50 and beyond is about settling in. Settling into showing up every day for myself!

So once again, thank you for being brave enough to start this thing without having a clue how it would unfold. We’re not done yet, but it feels like the most painful parts of this have been transmuted into creative energy. Now, I can create unapologetically, and accept that it’s okay to choose an unconventional path to meaningful work.

Let’s keep going.

Love,

Day 50 Amber

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